Warnings, Disclaimers, and Major Credit

Be forewarned! Cursing & mature subject matter in this blog may be inevitable./ No copyright infringement intended. /No actual stalking tendencies intended. /All puns ARE intended./Further disclaimer: Any negative things stated by Mr. AnTwi-Pattz about RPattz or anything else related to Twilight are not to be taken seriously as they are mostly just to make fun of me and my, errr..., fondness toward RPattz and all things Twilight.
-TT tonguetwied@gmail.com "Purple's cool!" My banner got your tongue wagging? It was created by the talented MissAmyJoon!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Birthday Art In the Afternoon

To commemorate the birthday of RPFangirlJR, a very special wing will be available today for viewings in the Museum of FanGirl Art!!

If you'll just wait here Fangirl in this luxurious lobby,


your tour guide should be along shortly. Admission is free today due to this holiday so anyone else who has found their way here today, feel free to tag along on this tour.


"I'm here. I'm here. *mumbles with accent hate that bloody boss*

"Uhhh, yeah, I forgot my uniform. Sorry 'bout that. Anyway, Happy Birthday, RPFangirl. I'm Art.

No, really that's my name and I work at a Fangirl Museum. I know, it's rather pathetic, isn't it? Well, I have this life coach named Jeanette, and she told me I should get a job. She said I'm really good at talking so she thought this would be a good fit. I dunno. You see I have this music thing, but it's not going so well. Oh hey, I have a gig on Tuesday if you want to come. It's on Tuesday...Tuesday, if you can make it. Uhhh, normally no one really shows, but you know if you want you can come. Yeah, okay.

So, let's get started. You're really quite lucky, actually. They only open this wing of the museum up on very special occasions and for real VIP types. So before we leave this room, I'm supposed to point out the painting on the wall. Self portrait of the big shot who funded this wing...Rob something or another. I get the distinct pleasure of calling him my boss. Not that I ever see the guy. He spends his days in his penthouse being painted into paintings. Must be nice.

Follow me."

"So you'll probably recognize this one. Why anyone wants to celebrate how rainy London is, is beyond me. It's depressing enough. Oh, and by the way, that's that Rob guy in there. He's easily missed in this one so I'm required to point him out. Second umbrella from the left."

"Okay next up, a gar-dun party."


"And what do you know, look who's there. This guy
is unbelievable! I suppose you like it though. All the serious fangirls do--the thought of this guy dressed up for a garden party eating his grapes, cheese, and gar-dun burgers. This one is called Fangirls at the Garden Party. Notice the lady in the yellow hat staring at him? Oh yeah, that's supposed to be a metador...no wait a metaphor for you. Gazing at him from afar.

*mumbles arrogant sod under his breath"


"You might recognize this, it's The Persistence of Rob in Your Memories. According to fangirls, he's just there swirling around in your thoughts morning, noon, and night--especially if you've seen him in person.

*mumbles riiiiiiiight"


"Ahh, now this is my favorite. The Screaming Rob! I mean it should just be a little more bloody acceptable and politically correct in life to just go out and scream once and a while, show a little frustration. Not that I believe Mr. Charmed Life ever gets frustrated over much."



"I don't even know what to say about this one. The guy has a bit of a G-d complex I think and it's like he just had to enter the chiseled arm competition. Let's keep moving on, shall we?"

"Oh here we go. Finally, one that's not him."

*Art pulls a piece of paper out of his back pocket. *

"I see, according to the notes, this one was brought in special just for your birthday. It says it is called 

Keep Awake 
*chuckles*

"I like this one. If I was that lady I'd sleep with one eye open."

"And, we are coming to the end of the room. The big fangirl finale of sorts. And this one is called 'Old Timer.'"

*laughs himself silly*

"No actually, this is called 'Timeless Rob' so make of that what you will. And so that is it and concludes our birthday tour!

No wait, Fangirl, don't open that door!! Noooooooo, it's...well I'm not sure if you are supposed to see what's in there. Bloody hell I haven't even been in that room yet. Come back. That's the newest LostImmortal exhibit but it's strictly by invite only!"



"Oh, I see you have a ticket from the exhibit patron. She has quite an extensive collection and has loaned the museum a few portraits from it. Okay, well it's your birthday so get on with it and take a look."

*pulls out notes*

"Yes I believe I have some info on this."

Number 1. Exhibit will be only black/white portraits.
Number 2. Photos based on J/E Fanfiction

*looks up from notes and scratches head*

"J/E Fanfiction, what the hell is that?"

Number 3. Artist is LostImmortal and the exhibit is sponsored by the affluent socialite @17ForeverLisa.


"Wait a minute, isn't that the Keep Awake guy?"



"Guess they are buddies. Maybe in a band together or something."


"Ohhhh, okay. So are they brothers? They look like they crack on each other a lot."


"Wait...wait a minute, that doesn't look like brothers!"




"Why does that Jackson guy's hair keep changing?"


"Uhhhh, I don't really know what to say..."

(At this time RPFangirl takes a moment to explain to poor naive Art exactly what this exhibit is about.)

"Really? No, really? Well okay then, I think we'll just get back on track wit the rest of the scheduled tour."

*Art makes a mental note to himself to check out J/E Fanfiction and wonders if there is any 'Art' Fanfiction as he escorts Fangirl out and closes the door behind him.*

"Okay so we are just going to continue heading down the hall back toward the lobby."

*looks over notes again*

"Oh, and so I'm just supposed to read this to you.

Dear Fangirl,
We hope you enjoyed your trip through the
special wing of the Museum of Fangirl Art.

blah, blah, blah, blah-blah, blah, blah

On behalf of the entire staff at the museum, I
wish you a very Happy Birthday. 


As you exit the Fangirl Wing  and return to the lobby,
someone will be awaiting
to escort you to the next wing of the museum.

*mumbles oh f*ck to himself*


*Art calls out after Donna, who has already bolted out the door with Rob.*

"Donna? Donna?
Goodbye Donna! Don't forget about my show...on Tuesday."


Wishing you a wonderful day!!!
 ~kiTT
 &
((((17 BIRTHDAY HUGS)))) ~Lisa

**And obviously, I couldn't have done this post without the help of Jeanette. She
made the really seemless-looking non J/E pictures and I did the rest. So tip your
Bel Ami black top hat to Jeanette for her skillz!**

12 comments:

itsjustme1217 said...

Lisa and TT, these are amazing! Great job
Happy Birthday RPfangirlJR!

Kelly said...

These are crazy good... OMG I feel a little unprepared for my post. Great job to you both!

rpfangirljr said...

Thank you all so much!!! I can't stop laughing my @$$ off!!!

With all that hotness, You'd think I'd stop giggling by now. ART was a fantastically awesome tour guide! And that was the best waiting room I have ever been in. (Can you imagine something like that at the GYN office? I'd never leave.)

The b&w slash museum... What a wonderfully novel idea. *sigh* I can't believe I had to explain it, though. I thought it was rather obvious. (And that one with ROb leaning on Jackson... *died*)

Now, I am going to have to play art smuggler and "borrow" some art from the musuems today.

Thank you so much!

Kelly said...

@RPG if that was in the GYN Office waiting room I think there would be legs in the air without the stirrups... yep I said it!

TongueTwied said...

yeah @kelly, not to mention their high pregnancy rate.

First thing they would make you do is pee in that cup!

BellaTesoro said...

Happy Birthday rpfangirljr!
I enjoyed your birthday greeting from Lisa and ktTT, anything they do is always sure to be educational, fun, and raunchy. What we have here is fine art at it's best.
Lucky you.
Art I believe, probably enjoyed Lost Immortal Exhibit even more than he let on. I know I did.

Munkee said...

Holy crap, those are amazing!! Very cool post.

17foreverlisa said...

This is freaking awesome, kiTT!

Jeanette, you outdid yourself with the alters. You and kiTT make a great collab team. Great ideas, great execution. Especially loved the use of the headboard image. Yum!

kiTT, thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting me slash up your blog once again and for providing the tour guide and commentary. I had a great time on the tour.

DJ, happy birthday once again, girlie. Hope you had a great day. Mwah!

TwitardedMom said...

Totally amazing. The pictures and dialogue for touring the Art museum were unbelievable. Loved the Keep Awake.

Lost Immortal was also awesome. You gals really outdid yourselves.

stephanieS74 said...

Wow, can I book my private tour now???

This was amazing!!! Happy birthday hun =)

creationsbyjules said...

Wow!! What a fantastic post - loved all the art manips. Wonderful work girls. :)

Happy belated birthday RPfangirljr xx

TongueTwied said...

@BT, Rob is the real fine art!

@Munkee, glad you liked!

@Lisa, I left the blog's back door open, didn't I? (pun intended)

@TM,I cracked myself up over Keep Awake. Glad you stopped by!

@Stephanie, Sign up for the h00r tour! Just be sure to bring the owner back!

@Jules, thank you! I hoped you would like this artsy angle!

Hope RPFangirl had a great birthday!!